The Two Things I Love About Religion as an Agnostic

I left religion in 2012 after many years of disillusionment with Christianity and the Bible.

The doctrine was unwieldy, the supposed punishments were insane and it was all predicated on a previous religion, Judaism, which was supposedly monotheistic but began as the polytheistic Yahwism.

Like many non-theists I know, it took many years before I finally left for good. But when I did, I felt relieved. For the first time since I was four years old, I didn’t have some random theological debate in my brain.

I didn’t fear punishment anymore because “God” as I knew him didn’t exist and therefore no punishment would ever come.

Technically, I was right. There was no punishment for leaving the faith. However, there were some consequences.

As I said, I felt relieved and excited about how life would play out. But what happened wasn’t what I expected and it led me to realize two crucial things.

Here’s something some non-theists warn you about when you leave a faith: You will feel alone.

In religion, not only are you united with a group of people who believe the same thing you do, you are linked to a being that is greater than you. It’s fairly easy to feel connected in that context.

Sure, you could be united with others who are fans of the same band as you or feel unified by those who share your profession, but this is different.

Some people love something to the point that they change how they dress, think and act. That’s fanaticism, and it’s easy for one’s identity to get wrapped up in that.

I loved what I loved but I don’t think anything ever took over my identity. Not even religion.

However, leaving religion showed me the importance of community and that while you might feel lonely, you’re never alone. I went to the places that reflected my values, met people and shared experiences that bonded us.

Right after leaving religion, I felt like just another cog in the system. Everyone was coldly going through life, doing their thing in isolation of one another.

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